Trying to salvage..

..my previous good mood. :/

I'm watching House, eating junk food, drinking Coke. And typing with my nails (finally, something I can do with them other than potentially kill people)

GAH. GAAAAH.

Okay, tomorrow. Tomorrow I will behave. I promise.

"What you want, you run away from. What you need, you don't have a clue. What you've accomplished, makes you proud."

--House was talking about Cuddy, but it sure as hell sounds like me to me. (and I bet to one other person, too. You know who you are. AND YOU CHEATED IN HOCKEY)

Anyway. I'm sleepy. :/

A lot of things are turning into crap at the moment. GAAAAAAH.

~ ticked off.

Empty Cartridge

Okay, it's raining. :D

I got an Albino Llama in dA! Yay for me! XD =))

My black ink cartrige is almost empty. O_O And the printer and cartridges are NEW. O_O GAH. Oh well. :D

My dad forgot to give me honey and honey comb! D: Wahahaha. Oh well.

I solved my best friend's math puzzle again. XD

123456789=100

minimum of 3 plus signs and 3 minus signs, and any grouping symbols you need.

1 + { [ ((2+3+4) - 5) +6] - (7-8) }(9) = 100

I feel so accomplished! XD

I wrote an essay today, and for once it didn't sound half as plastic as I expected it would. I also tried writing my first Tanaga. =)) It didn't sound half as shitty as I thought it would, either. XD

Tanaga

Essay

Hrm. I think that's about it for now.

Oh and. We had to answer this checklist of things for guidance. I was kinda surprised to see how many checks I put and on which phrases. O_e

Anyway.

That's all, for now. :D

Pink Icing

Why is there no pink in the options for the font color? :( Oh well.

I just got back from my sister's party. It was the first REAL kiddy party we've hosted since I was.. two.

Right now I'm being childish and stealing all the icing off my sister's cake. XD Yes, I have a penchant for finishing off all those little pink globs of tooth doom. Besides. That's the only edible thing on a cake! (well, that was what I thought until I was eleven)

Anyway.

Birthday parties always make me really sad. Yeah, I'm weird like that. I just hate how they all arrive, (people tend to come around 30 minutes late. always) then there are games, then the food, then they sing, and then the loot bags are given out and everybody leaves. I mean. Birthdays go way deeper than that.

Friendships are so much more than climbing on their shoulders to get the good prizes from pabitin, than comparing what you got in the loot bag and then exchanging all your candies. And it just gets me really sad how they can all say goodbye so cheerfully. I wish I could learn how to do that again.

Okay, I'm rambling. Sorry. :D

My sister got like. Seven make up sets. WTF. XD Anyway.

My lips chap really easily nowadays. D:

"Can I play?"

"Sure."

"Text when you miss me."

"I MISS YOU. COME BACK! *sob*"

That was completely random. XD

Anyway. I'm not in the mood to write anymore. Meh. :/

--Okay, I was born a Christian, and raised a Christian, and right now I'm contemplating becoming an atheist or at least an agnostic, but this offended me.

I was expecting a better argument than the hypocrisy and the incest, though those are pretty good points. (seriously, I've thought about the incest a lot, and I don't mind it so much now 'cause hey, at least we didn't end up looking like shit or having mush brains)

Also, I don't think the girl you mentioned was a bad speller just 'cause she was Christian. But yeah, she was a hypocrite, too.

I don't hate Christians in general. I respect all religions; I mean, that's their thing, their life, sure. They can go rape lambs and eat their livers on their balconies. As long as they don't force me to join them, I'll be nice. I just don't like when I'm forced to be part of it. The thing I hate about Christians is the forcing of public worship. I hate going to Mass.

Also. There was this comment up there talking about God and Jesus living in the sky. Nobody ever says they 'live in the sky'. They are in Heaven. They don't live in the SKY. Heaven ≠ Sky. WTF?!

I guess if God WILL judge us, then.. we better not judge others. And if you believe in reincarnation.. isn't part of that belief the concept that you're reincarnated into something based on what you did in your past life? And once it's done, you can't change it until the next life. And.. why would you say "a bug, or some sort of shitty animal"?

But I guess.. that's just my opinion.

I am amused by religion-bashing monologues in general, but.. wow. One of the few times I wasn't.--

--> the comment I left on a journal entry bashing Christians. :D Here

~ gaaaah.

Repo: The Genetic Opera

Not so suckish after all.

Okay, today started out pretty crappy.

I woke up sandwiched between Miles and Nicky, and for some reason the blanket was with Miles. :| It's MY bed. And she was supposed to be sleeping on the top bunk, and she was denying she ever transferred to mine. WTF.

Then mom went into the room to wake us up and make us get ready for Mass. I think it's been made pretty clear that I hate going to Mass. I really do. I have nothing against the religion (it's what I put on all the official papers, after all) but.. I just really dislike the concept of HAVING to go. Of being subjected to scathing looks of disapproval (and, at times, lengthy, repetitive sermons) whenever you state that you don't feel like it.

We're supposed to be able to worship God whenever, wherever. No real need to go out into the streets yelling it, or gather in a chapel and sing songs whose tune changes WITH EVERY FREAKING RENDITION.

(I seriously mean that. In MC alone, we must've gone through at least 4 versions of the Ama Namin. What the fuck)

Okay, enough on that.

On the way there I decided to play Battle of the Puppets. Adorable graphics. Reminds me somewhat of Little Big Planet, except no semi-3d effect. And you can't dress them up. But still! XD

Anyway. During Mass, I kept trying to clench my jaw. It seriously hurt. But it was either that pain, and possibility of succeeding, or listening to a priest who looks suspiciously like my mom's friend go on and on about a Gospel I heard before.

I think you can guess which I opted for.

On the way home, my day started looking up. Yes, one text can do that. Yes, I mean you.

Thank you. >:D<

Hm. What else.

I didn't eat much breakfast; my jaw hurt too much from trying to clench. Yay for an alternative method to dieting! :D

"HEYLO."

"LOLLERCOASTER."

"Your word is cooler than mine! *sob*"

"Wha--

IT DOESN'T MATTER. *hug*"

Yay for Kirsten. >:D<

They're stuffing me in a dress later. O_O And curling my hair. ._. This is why I say my mom thinks I'm her Barbie Doll. >_> Oh well.

I'm off. Must get ready for my sister's party.

(HA I've so got the pabitin down. XDD Bahahahaha)

~ alright now. :D

Jaw Pain

Okay, a lot of people would say I know nothing of "real" jaw pain. FUCK THAT. I don't care about "real" jaw pain, I care about MY jaw pain.

I fucking hate this. I can't even fucking clench my jaw properly. Not just 'cause it hurts, 'cause I FUCKING CAN'T. There's a part of my braces that stops me from doing so. WHAT THE FUCK.

GODDAMNIT. It's freaking throbbing already. And I thought the upper half was bad enough. FUCK THIS.

I have the assurance that I won't be able to sleep properly tonight. :| Damn it.

I feel like bashing someone's head in.

And the really sad thing? I don't have anyone to want to kill. If I did that would at least make it a little bit easier. But no. *sigh*

And my life keeps getting better.

WE'RE GOING TO FUCKING MASS TOMORROW.

It's not that I'm completely atheist, and it's not that I hate my religion. I just do not believe in the concept of public worship. Sure, you can go exalt your deity in the streets, hold up traffic and whatever, but DON'T DRAG ME INTO IT. I'm pretty damn accepting of a lot of things, as long as THEY'RE NOT FOISTED DOWN MY THROAT.

Whatever happened to the parable of the tax collector, damnit? :/

SCREW THIS MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF SHIT.

~ in a pain-induced rage.

Lithp :|

I have a fucking LISP. T_T

I can't clench my jaw properly, either. Meaning all I can do is laugh. Or smile with my mouth closed. Grah.

The taste of the glue is really bad, too. Most of it's gone already, but there are still some traces. It's sour with a bitter tinge. Like an angry lemon.

Yes, the word lemon was the basis of the color of this entry. :))

Okay, I guess I better start trying to cope with this.

I need to write more! Waha. I haven't written much since school started. Fuuuck. T_T

Anyway. Posted a new poem on KlutzInk. :D I don't think the title's very good, but meh. It got read out in class! And yes, I consider that an achievement. =)) It's an abstract sort of poem, and the style was pretty strict. She said to base it on what you felt at that point in your life, so.. yeah. XD

I suppose that's all. :D

~ The Raspberry Scribbler.

Damn Mosquitoes.

Grah. They're eating at my legs. AGAIN. Why do they always do this! Wahaha. I hate how I can't help but scratch at the hives sometimes. And then I get stupid scratches. *sigh* I need more self control.

Anyway. I'm back in Manila! :D Gonna get my bottom braces sometime later. X3 Wish me luck. I hope I don't feel like killing too many people after the whole shebang is over.

It's kind of awkward for me to watch Nickelodeon cartoons which are Tagalog-dubbed. It's actually pretty awkward for me to watch any cartoons Tagalog-dubbed, if I've seen them before in English. Is that too biased of me?

I wonder. When will people stop asking me to speak in something other than English? It gets pretty irritating at times. I mean, what is your problem? What's so wrong with speaking English? Jeez. I don't mind when you speak something other than what I do. "Oh, c'mon. Speak in English, for the heck of it." :/ Yeah, I don't do that.

Does it not occur to you that you would be required to speak in English if ever you left the country? What, you'd expect everyone else to speak in Tagalog too, just 'cause you do? You think they'll understand you at all if you try to pressure them to talking the way you do? What the hell.

Oh well. That rant shall be saved for another time. I must go leave now. :D

~ The Raspberry Scribbler.

Subhuman

Okay, fine. I'm a bitch for saying that, but meh. Fuck this shit.

You're supposed to do what I want, when I want. Not when it suits you. Because you are paid to do exactly that. I don't even fucking boss you around, and you still have the nerve to complain? Fuck you. Just 'cause you've been with us since I was three does not give you that right. You will never have that right.

Just 'cause my mom treats you like a human (to your face, at least) does not mean I will.

I am not my mother.

Don't you fucking expect me to ever respect you, because with the way you're acting now, it's not gonna happen.

~ annoyed.

Headaches and Mallows.

Okay, I'm calming down now.

I am also currently trying to fix up my Research homework (the one that got screwed up before) and trying to start on my SSIP shit. ...Damn. I don't feel like it! T_T

I'm too hungry. I'm already binging, and I'm still hungry. Grah. Oh well.

My best friend cheered me up today (well, it was something from yesterday, so her past self cheered me up. XD haha)

"I firmly believe my best friend is a brilliant klutz, and I mean that in the most endearing way possible."

>:D<>

~ has a hunger headache.

Damn Phone.

Okay, I really hate how people constantly borrow my phone. I mean, yeah, it's fine if you take it for a few moments to play, but then it becomes all you ask for from me. *sigh*

Also. It is senseless to borrow it during class. Why? Because how the hell can you use it? You can't listen to music, you can't use the apps. What the fuck. What, you're gonna risk getting it confiscated? Not wanting it to be confiscated or damaged is not a sign of being materialistic, as you so love to label me, but of knowing how to set your priorities straight. I've got the responsibility of keeping my phone out of harm's way, because my parents spent a hell lot of money on it for me.

And another thing. FOR ME. ME. That is not SELFISHNESS, that is barely hinting at possessiveness. It's OWNERSHIP. It is MINE, which means when I ask for it back, I have the right to get it back. "What's mine is yours," is not necessarily literal, you know. It means you share, you borrow, but you GIVE IT BACK WHEN I ASK FOR IT BACK.

And another thing. Why bother hanging out with me anymore if you're just going to ask for my phone and play it the whole time we're 'together' anyway? What the fuck?

You know what? If you want a phone like that so much, go get one yourself. You're always stating how you're so fucking rich, right? I'd like to see you go out and buy one. Just to spite me. See how shitty you feel when people around start deviating from "Sup?" to "Phone! Borrow phone!"

*sigh*

And it does not help that you equate laughing to happiness. Just because I laugh, does not mean I am happy, or in your terms, "happy enough to laugh." It means something was funny, and that I am not an apathetic, indifferent freak.

And you know what? It really ticks me off when you ask what's wrong, and I answer, and your answer is "So?" "I don't fucking care." or something along those lines. Jeez. If you didn't care in the first place, why would you ask?

Oh, right. To spite me. Which you just love doing.

Screw this.

~ frustrated.

I hate SSIP

I've got a rant on SSIP in my dA, too, but meh.
It ruined my summer, and now it's ruining my school year. ARGH.

I haven't started my fucking journal yet (we have to do EVERY day?!) and I don't feel like printing any pictures. Damnit.

I hate how we have so many fucking requirements. This is why sometimes I hate my school. :/

On a lighter note, I have the new iOS4, I got to use my Magic Mouse (FINALLY) and I solved my best friend's puzzle. :D

JKLMN x 4 = NMLKJ

(Sorry, dude. That rough sketch of my thought processes was all I could give you. T_T Wah)

Anyways. I've started transferring my poems and shiz from dA already. I don't think I can do much later, though; I gotta start with my SSIP requirements and redo my ResHW.

I found my SSIP blog! XD MisterWednesday

I suppose that's all. :D

~ The Raspberry Scribbler

Last Post Indefinitely (Possibly)

I'm feeling pretty shitty right now.

Long story short, I left my laptop in the van that brought me to school from the airport. Yes, I got it back, but my parents are pretty.. Geh. Ten to one they'll confiscate it, and my phone, too. Either that or they implement restrictions that'll make it almost impossible to actually use them properly.

So this will most probably be one of the last posts in a long time. T_T And to think I just started, wtf. GAH.

But yeah. My life tends to suck. I guess I really need to get used to that.:/ Fuckers.

"Jeez, you forget it like, once. And you're already irresponsible and careless?" -- this is why you are my best friend. *hug* X3

So anyway. Yeah. I guess I have nothing more to say.

Oh and. I have to redo just about everything I was supposed to pass for Research, since my dad's printer screwed it up. :/ Oh well.

GAH. WHY does the new School Year have to start so shittily?

~ frustrated.

At the Airport.

I am currently running on 28 minutes of sleep and an empty stomach.

Why, you ask?

I stayed up til 11 last night doing Research Homework, and after that stayed up til around 1:30 looking for my fucking Magic Mouse since my mom told me that if I couldn't find it I'd have to leave my laptop back there. Obviously, I couldn't let that happen.

So yeah. I went around the whole damn house looking for it; I turned my cabinets and the stock room upside down and inside out. I even took another damn bath at the end of it 'cause I got so dusty.

I guess I gave up a little past one, and then I just sat on my bed, trying to fall asleep. But I couldn't, I just couldn't. (I even tried crying; it didn't work) I was too mad. It wasn't even MY fucking fault the stupid Mouse ended up lost. My fucking maid packed stupidly. GAAH.

So here I am, wearing my blue sweater and purple jacket over a new Von Dutch tee, sitting on a swivelly chair in front of my laptop, typing this entry out. *yawn*

I wanna see what happens to me later. X3 We have a flag cem AND PE class. If I survive, I will feel epic for the rest of the day. XD

My dad's printer screwed up my Concept Maps, and my stapler ran out of staple wires. T_T Aah, the mundane trivialities of a teenage life, bedecked with the glimmering pearls of pessimism and sprinkled with glittery wit. Okay, I'll stop talking shitty now. =))

My molars are hurting again. :(

~ pained.

Edit: this was supposed to be posted yesterday, but the net disappeared. So the actual date for this should be 21.6.10 instead of 22.6.10 :D

Damnit

Okay, I'm really pissed right now.

I just got back from my grandparents' house, (and from lunch with half my family... which took forEVER. Now I usually don't mind when meals take long (half the time I'm the reason they do) but I really needed to get back home.

I haven't finished my fucking ResHW, and now the internet is being a bitch and not showing me any articles from scholar Google or ScienceDaily. FUCK THIS SHIT.

So here I am, posting my first rant on blogger. GOD.

It does not help that it is FUCKING hot right now, and since my mom had my hair curled and she made me wear this fancy blouse, my shoulders feel really scratchy. Also, my brother banged my jaws together four times today. Once in the morning, twice in succession an hour after, and once thirty minutes ago. Suffice to say I feel like ripping my jaw out just to see if it would stop aching.  

Nothing is going my way this moment; even the Coke that was supposed to help me just tastes really spiritless and dry. And it's fucking WARM, wtf. 

GAAAAH. I can't take this right now. Can someone please press delete on my weekend? 

~ irritable.

First Post!

Okay, well. First post, yay for me! XD

I'll be transferring some entries from my dA soon (read: after I've dealt with my Research Homework), and after that, more blogs!

I've had the idea to start a blog in my head for a while, but I just never took the time to try it. That's one thing I never get enough of: TIME. I'm so stressed right now, in so many ways. It's like I can't even rest without wondering what I need to do next, 'cause my life is just so hectic.

Yes, I'm a grammar Nazi. And yes, I do hate people who think they write brilliantly but don't. It just really irks me the way they "write". 

A considerable portion of the posts here are going to be rants, because I get really moody sometimes and my day-to-day life tends to suck. If you can't stomach excessive swearing, cynical worldviews or the possibility of having a personality disorder, then click the little red bottom at the top of the window. Loser.

Anyway. 

Aside from my being a pottymouth, a cynic and a temperamental bitch, I'm also a very open-minded person, who frowns upon narrow-minded fucktards. And Twilight.

Seriously, I hate Twilight. I ranted about it a couple of times, but I realized it wasn't worth that. There are dozens of anti-Twilight clubs, blogs, comics and people, and they've all made their hatred known through the Internet at one point or another, so what the hell. I may or may not contribute to that, but don't expect anything soon. 

This blog will most certainly be pretty damn disorganized, no matter how hard I'll try to keep it neat. I'm not OCD (except concerning some things) and I don't think anyone will ever think me to be.

I can be a real brat sometimes, but that's not ALL of me. I can play nice, too. If you're civil, I will be, too. And even if no one believes I can, I will beat you up if you give me good reason to. 

I'm irresponsible and messy, and I always wear socks. I can get really emotional at times, and be a total jerk at others. A lot of things affect my mood; schoolwork, people, rain. I write to let things out a lot, but don't expect frequent pieces. I don't do commissions, unless you're my best friend or something.

(yes, I can get really damn self-centered, too)

AGH. My spacers hurt. TT_TT And I haven't finished my Res HW yet. FUCK THIS SHIT.

~The Raspberry Scribbler