Eurgh, Garble Garble Blah

Okay, so I bounced back from yesterday's depression. Yay for me. :D

But really. Nevermind what I said yesterday. Why? Because..

1. I don't wanna elaborate on it right now, and

2. I've realized it's pretty useless to complain about shit like that, and to expect any more from you. So.. never mind. Really.

Anyway. I changed my Research problem again. I gotta go check up on the toxicity of dark chocolate to mice, the factors affecting blood pressure, and the evident changes made in blood pressure after eating dark chocolate; before I get to rewrite it.

Also, we have to practice the damn Fil thing. >_>

Anyway. Ho hum. Math long test tomorrow, and Bio long test next week. Chem speed test tomorrow, too. >_> Meh. I don't feel like studying. Seriously.

Note: I don't study if I don't feel at the very least, okay. So if I'm pissed off, you better believe that I won't even look at my notes. It's much more likely that I'll rip 'em, than peruse them. So good luck convincing me to study, if something pissed me off.

I suppose that's all. :D

...

You know what? The thing that really hurts, is that you were supposed to be on my side. Even if, and especially when I'm wrong.

I think I just remembered how to abuse my tear ducts.

*sigh*

..blows, junior.

Here we go. X3

I didn't want to just edit my previous entry. XD

Baby, please come back. It wasn't you, baby, it was me.

Maybe our relationship isn't as crazy as it seems.

Maybe that's what happens when a tornado meets a volcano

All I know is, I love you too much to walk away, no~

URGH. Still hooked on it. TT_TT Oh well. :D

I'm gonna stop eating junk food this week again; I really need to learn to control myself. I've been bingeing the past two weeks, 'cause of all the stress. ARGH. I am so FRUSTRATING. TT_TT

I guess I figured out that I can work well under stress. :D The only bad effects are that, well, I feel like shit for weeks after and I start bingeing. I start resenting people, too. But of course I never show it. Honestly.

I need to remember to write for the contests around dA. It'll at least get my work noticed, even as only an entry, not necessarily a winner. :D And even if that fails, at least I got to write.

I miss writing songs, honestly. :( But I think I've lost some of that skill. Maybe I've just settled for the easier path; and I mean WAY easier path.

I used to have fun writing the songs, making sure they sound good, keeping the tune stuck in my head. Now all I end up doing is stringing my words together to keep some form of rhythm. I've deteriorated.

So I'm pushing myself to write at least one song each week. (Yes, I failed at my last push, but fuck that.) Aside from that, I gotta write at least three poems a week. That's good enough, right? Three poems, one song. I'm not gonna overwork myself and try to write a short story a week. I need to grow as a writer more, before I can do that.

Gosh, I love chocolate milk. It's the only kind I drink, though I've been wanting to try hazelnut. (my best friend adores it, so it's a shoe-in for my addiction list)

I think I've grown to like Ginger Ale more than other soda, too. I don't think there's any here, though. D: Waha.

Dum Dum gave me some Almond Roca yesterday! *huggle* Yay for dum dum. He survived the Research exam, too. :D Wooooh.

Apparently, all the people who weren't paying attention in the damn lecture yesterday are gonna be called this week. For an IR? Not sure. For a lengthy sermon? Most likely. -__- ARGH. Jeez. If you want the teenagers to listen, make sure you get a speaker who's actually INTERESTING. Like that funny professor from Ateneo. He's like, the ONE interesting speaker I've been an audience to, in Pisay. Seriously.

Also. Next week, the girls have to start wearing their uniforms again. D: Wahaha. Oh well. it was fun while it lasted. :D Besides, it was getting kind of tiring stressing out over what to wear each morning, and with all the limitations on the clothes it was basically only allowed to dress up in six letters: B-O-R-I-N-G.

Tee and Jeans, wearing socks and Covered shoes? Hell. Bitches.

Anyway. I still hate love songs. :D I suppose I always will. Those icky mushy ones, anyway. I'll listen to them, sure, and I won't diss you for liking them, but still. Doesn't mean I'll like em. They just... eh. They rub it in, what I can't have, what I'm not quite sure I ever did. It does hurt.

So. To wrap up.

•three poems, one song per week

•look for contests and write for them

•do homework more diligently

•don't binge

:D Wish me luck, donuts. :)

~the Raspberry Scribbler.

Well, this really blows.

Argh. Chel chel got me hooked on Love the Way You Lie. TT_TT This is not fair. It's too awesome. ARGH. It's gonna get stuck in my mind for the rest of the week. (>_<)

Anyway. I GOT FEATUUURED. X3 I was so happy. I mean, it felt like what I wrote was really appreciated. See, I don't force my work down other peoples' throats. If they stumble upon it, and they like it, then yay. But I won't go around asking them to read it, assuring they'll love it. I'm not like that. Yes, you might say I have no right to say my work is under-appreciated if I don't take the initiative to get it noticed, but fuck you.

KIDDING. XD I won't be defensive today. Well, not much. Haha. Anyway. I am taking a sort of initiative. I have a dA account, and since dA is teeming with thousands of awesome artists, I guess that's good enough.

I'm actually more comfortable putting up my work where strangers (artists, yes, but strangers nonetheless) would have the freedom to judge, instead of going through the crushing awkwardness of letting it fall under the scrutiny of people I actually know, and who know ME. I mean. They'd read it, and their view of it would be clouded by how they view me. And then they'd judge ME by how they read it.

The most likely reactions would be

"God, she uses SUCH big words."

"Why do her sentences, like, NEVER end?"

"She's SOO emotional. KSP."

and, of course, the one that will piss me off the most:

"I don't GET it."

SERIOUSLY.

People, stop thinking so fucking LITERALLY. Stop freaking out when I use out-of-this-world metaphors and words you never knew how to spell right and PROPER GRAMMAR. That's how I write.

This is why I like having my work critiqued by artists, and not looked on by my peers. Because those artists will view my work with an artistic view, and they will understand for the most part, and they will have no prior bias based on knowledge of my personality. My peers will not.

It's also why few people know that I write. I don't feel like telling them unless I know that a) they'll never judge me or b) they'll criticize it PROPERLY.

Examples of what, to me at least, is a proper critique:

"You missed out on a period in the second stanza-- or was that just me?"

"Whoops, I think you spelled ~~~~~ wrong, in the second line of your third verse."

"As for me, I don't really agree with the entire view of the piece -- however, it made good use of ~~~~~~"

"I especially like the line/s ~~~~~~~ because ~~~~~~~"

"I don't see too much emotion in this one, unlike your other pieces, but maybe that's only because ~~~"
"You really captured the ~~~~"

etc.

Jesus Christ, people. What the hell.

~ to be continued.

Edit: It has been continued! Looky.

HOLY SHIT

I. GOT. FEATURED. O_O

CHECK. IT. OUT. O_O

This actually made me happy and less stressed. :D I am sooooooooo happy. I feel pretty damn good about myself right now, too. :) WOOOOH.

I think that's all right now. (:

I have to transfer some of my new poems to KlutzInk, too. o-o But still. (: HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY.

This so beats having to do homework. :)

WOOOO. (:

~ the HAPPY Raspberry Scribbler. :D

Pretty Shitty

Gah. I hate all this. Everything is screwed up right now. And just because I can, I shall enumerate them.

First of all, I hate chem. What sense is there in giving us lab work before the lessons? Sure, you can ask us to do experiments, they're mostly just following simple instructions, but don't ask us to fully grasp the concepts of six Laws on our own. From a source like the Internet, no less. That's what you're there for, to teach it to us in such a way that we'd understand it.

And yes, the source given to us was no doubt very much scientific and explanatory of the Laws, but how can you expect us to decipher those large blocks of text? It's not that the words used were too long, too complicated, not that it's extremely confusing and quite impossible to extract an actual procedure to getting the formula right most of the time. It's that when confronted with large blocks of text, people tend to shut down (in the sense that they don't bother paying too much attention.) They think 'Oh, god, this is gonna be BORING." and immediately surrender at least part of their will to actually scrutinize it. And keep in mind, I'm speaking generally here.

It would've helped if there were examples. Solid examples of HOW people got it, e.g. if you're trying to drill in their head the concept of the magic 11 multiplication trick, you don't say "Copy the digits one space apart and then add them, and place their sum in between them." What the hell, people would much rather get the product on their own. You give a proper example, like "See here, we'll try it with 22. 11 x 22 = 242 because..." You don't give them a problem straight away and then ask them to guess at an answer. They could screw up, and keep screwing up, and they wouldn't know WHY, because they don't have tangible proof that there is a RIGHT WAY to do it. It's like giving a first grader a whole essay on how to add, instead of DEMONSTRATING. The easiest way for them to get it right is by imitating. How can they do that if you don't do it first?!

*sigh* Also. You know, I actually appreciate how Sir Aris treats us equally, in that he posts the announcements on the bulletin board. You can go on and on and on about how "It's your fault for not having a Facebook!" but, well. Are you really going to force that choice on me? What if all your classmates decided to become vegan and go on a vegan club, and their leader happened to be your, let's say, Bio instructor. What if she gave your class homework, only as a passing announcement, but they had extra time in the club and she elaborated on it, and sometimes helped them? What, you're going to go vegan, because they were inconsiderate enough not to inform you? You're gonna give them the right to say "It's your fault. You eat meat." You're gonna make a life-changing decision just like that?

Not that I'm actually comparing making an account to changing your life, though pretty soon it'll be like that. FaceBook seems to be taking over the world. Then again, they thought that about MySpace, too. :/ Oh well.

Now for the second part of my rant. :D

And now we kiss~

"They're still looking at us!"

"Well, it was worth a shot."

What the crap. Go Arthur and Ariadne! :D

Anyway. Today I am off to get a haircut. Bangs, bangs, BANGS. O_e And maybe renew my highlights, too. Just to freak people out a little bit more.

I'm not sure if everything will still be to Bambi's liking, though. I'll try to make sure it doesn't scare the crap out of you too much, dearie. >:D< =))

Ah well. I've (not-so-)successfully made an Origami Vato (model by J. A. Voyer) and a Due Cigni (model by David Derudas). GRAH. I need to pay more attention to the folds. AND I need to be more precise. I hate messy origami pieces.

I'm still pretty deft at making roses out of scratch, though. :D Yay for me.

AND WE'RE HAVING BRIE AND MORTADELLA TODAY. I love breakfast here. :)

I shall start with my ResHW later, and I need to start writing for some contests, too. Yes, I have fallen prey to the writing contests around dA. If I don't win (which is likely) I'll still have made a new piece. (yes, only 2/3 left to go! what the crap. =)))

For some reason, Ellen Page looks like that girl Susan in Narnia (the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe) and it seems like she's got a thang for Leo DiCaprio. O_e Which is creepily gross.

Now I'm stuck helping my sister think of an IP, trying to drive it in my other sister's mind that humans are biodegradable, and halfheartedly escaping my father's trying to give me spinach juice. ARGH.

I'm stuck in a rut, with no way out

trying to reach for the sun and

the sky's falling down~

No, that's not from any song, I came up with it right now. :D

I think that's about it, though. ARGH, I feel sick.

~the not-feeling-so-great Raspberry Scribbler (though you can't spell AWESOME without ME X3 wtf)

Loose.

Holy crap, the exams are over. Yaaay. X3 FINALLY, WE ARE FREE. *happy dance*

Also. I finally figured out how to switch my font to Century Gothic, since I feel like it. X3 So yes. If all goes well, this shall be the new font. Besides, I can always just switch back to Courier when I feel like it. X3

*sigh* We're being sent away for nine whole days, due to the dengue outbreak. "Outbreak." So there's a pretty good chance we'll have no sem break this school year, either. o-o WAHA. Oh well.

So this week I shall be fixing up my Res paper, doing my Chem activity, and videotaping my Paperiffic project. Woohoo. Isn't it amazing how efficiently my school makes us feel like we'd much rather have class? :/

On the upside. I'm getting a haircut soon. Well, not really a haircut; I'm still aiming for waist-length. I shall just be equipped with bangs. Straight cut bangs. 6 year-old bangs. Or, in Nikole's words, a fringe. Haha. X3

WHOA, holy crap. I clicked Command + H and my whole window disappeared. O_e XD What the hell. =))))))

We went to a Jollibee drive-thru for lunch. Their spaghetti tastes surprisingly good. Well, not extremely good. On the better side of okay, maybe? X3 I'm not gonna say it was better than the spag served at McDo, but I'm not gonna say it was worse, either. :D

I've been writing a lot lately. Well, not really a LOT, but. More than I usually do in an entire week. And to think I was supposed to be studying when I was writing. X3 Oh well.

I reached 50+ pieces! X3 And was featured in a dA news article. Woohoooo. I might do a feature. Once I have the time. X3

I think that's all (I gotta start up on the feature, and my fingers are tired.)

~ the NEWLY LIBERATED Raspberry Scribbler :D

Finally, it's here.

Well, today's today. Which is partly why my font is pink. X3

twenty months! (yeah, we actually made it that far)

Shoutout to my bestial dum dum. HUUUUUG. *GLOMP*

Sadly, my dum dum is missing today. o-o :( DUM DUM COME BACK OR I'M KICKING YOU TOMORROW. (>_<)

Also. I'm done with most of the stuff on my checklist of homework to accomplish this weekend. Yay for me! \:D/

I still gotta go finish up his concept paper, though. And I need to proofread my Health short story. Any volunteers? =))

I got another wound from my braces. On my finger, again. T_T I gotta stop wondering what jagged metal feels like on flesh. >_> Oh well.

I'm currently trying to finish up my sister's birthday gift. (yes, I am FINALLY giving her an actual gift) It's a Kusudama ball, with her favorite colors. :D

We've fought a whole hell of a lot more than most pairs of siblings (seriously. we've made each other bleed profusely more times than I can count. fingers AND toes) but we've never really cared. I guess 'cause it was just the two of us for a long time (Miles came along after five more years) and it was a mix of my would-be independence and her annoying-as-hell tagging along, my pride and her stubbornness, my temper and her sensitivity. Not a good mix. Less of fire and ice, a bit more of.. jagged metal and broken glass. I'll leave you guys to figger out which ones pertain to us, respectively.

Yes, figger. Figger is an awesome word, made even awesomer by the fact that it was created by the awesome Tigger!

Yes, the one and only Tee Eye Double-Guh Err. >:D<>

I figger I might havta do some more figgerin later on; try and finish the concept paper.

GAAH. I miss you. TT_TT *sigh*

Oh well. I feel hungry, but I don't want a heavy meal. I want a light one, so I can eat more. I'm a glutton, deal with it. :D

~ the Raspberry Scribbler.

I hated July.

7.31.10

I haven't been submitting journal entries to dA in a while. D: I keep forgetting to import them in from my Blogger. Wah.

So for a change I decided to write here first, and then import it there.

So July has been shitting on me constantly. Yes, the month. Why? I have no idea. It just has. It's been a really sucky month for me. Homework piling up, tests every day. I'm failing Physics and Chem. Math most probably, too. But screw it. I hate this.

I haven't been normal lately. I've been in a really foul mood about some people, but of course I wouldn't tell them. I'm not like that. I can resolve the issue on my own, WITHOUT having to let them know, what the crap. I'll sleep it off! I'll get over it within a day! Don't think I have to confront you about it all the time.

All I need right now is sleep, but I've got a crapload of work to do.

-Concept paper

-English paper

-Health stories

-Filipino poems

I'm not gonna say which of those are mine. *sigh* I need a break from life.

I need to write more, too. :/ My pieces are getting shittier and shittier.

~out.