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I saw this fanfic online the other day. Actually, weeks ago. =)) But anyway. This boy, let's call him James, and this girl, let's call her.. Sarah, were a dysfunctional couple until the second boy, let's call him.. Evan, went and stole Sarah. Successfully. Well, my close friends know that this story tends to hit pretty close to home. But that's not why it struck a chord with me.
James didn't fight for her. At all. And that's a disappointment most girls go through regretfully. I mean, c'mon.
If you really loved her, needed her, wanted her like you said you did, you wouldn't go down without a fight. You'd do anything and everything in your power to have her, keep her, make her happy. It's not right to just give up because you think he can make her happier than you can. You're not even supposed to think that. If she thinks it, change her mind.
If you went after her in the first place, it should be because you know you can make her happy, not just that she makes you happy. You should know and believe that you are the best for her, the one that will make her believe in forever and right now. Because being good for her just isn't good enough.
Most guys will put their best foot forward while courting or dating or whatever, just to convince her to be with them. That isn't right. Hell, their best foot should be their only foot. They should be at least consistent, making sure they're not just pretending. Because falling for someone and realizing that they're not who you thought they were, well, it really hurts.
Everyone has the right to know just what they've signed up for. Don't give her a false dream that you're the perfect guy for her and crush her heart when you show your true colors; never calling, rarely checking to make sure she's okay, taking time out of your own life just to drop by and tell her you miss her. 'Cause most guys make the mistake of taking girls for granted. Once you have her, you see no need to make her want you, thus, the charm that you had ebbs all away because you don't think you'll need it anymore. Idiot. When she sees that, a smart girl will get up, shake the tears from her eyes and the glamour from your façade, and leave you. A weak girl will stay because she thinks she can make it work, or because she just doesn't know how to do otherwise. And you're only hurting both people in that relationship.
Here's a quote from a song by the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Cat and Mouse.
You said, you said that you would die for me;
but you must live for me too.
Know what that means? It means you shouldn't waste a single moment with them. Don't be so eager to give everything up for them that you forget; sometimes they don't want, don't need you to do that. Sometimes they just need you to be there and hold them. You don't have to do anything drastic and stupid like dying and just breaking their hearts. I mean, think about it. I'm not telling you to be too selfish or something like that, but really. Would you really be able to handle it if she could live without you? Would you even be able to handle to possibility?
You shouldn't give up, is what I'm saying. You shouldn't just say you'll be happy for her, whatever she chooses. You should tell her that you can make her the happiest she's ever been and could be. And you should prove it, too. Make her believe that you're the right one for her; the only one. Because being passive and not doing anything about it is not an option. If you don't fight to get her, and keep her, you never deserved her in the first place.
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Now I'm sorry if this blog entry puts boys in a bad light. I'm just sort of hating on them a little too much lately. Boys can act like such jerks sometimes. *sigh*
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